Chess As An Adult

There is nothing as humbling and hubris sapping as learning to play chess as an adult. I don’t mean learning to move the pieces, I mean truly trying to learn to play…

I have been dabbling with the topic for a few years, mainly through my enjoyment of watching Chess; but there comes a point where you want to start getting serious about your own play.

Again, this is not something I am going to ever be great at, my age precludes it sadly. But the act of studying, seriously, the game and all it’s nuances is something I am attempting to tackle for enjoyment and hopefully results. On and off. And that is the key to my failure, so far I have been unable to sustain a regular study plan, despite best intentions, mainly due to some reoccurring health issues and other commitments, such as being a single parent to two children.

Chess teaches you many things, not just about the game and the nature of strategy and tactics and planning etc, but also about yourself psychologically.

I stopped playing games online via PS5 and PC over the last few years due to my reflexes not being what they once were; and the enjoyment of what I could once do to a fairly high level vs where I am now sapped the enjoyment. I think that says something about my competitive nature that isn’t necessarily flattering, but it is what it is in the sense that I want to be the best I can be at something.

And this is where chess is a great leveler, if you have any ego, it will be crushed, if you have pretensions they will be sandpapered off. Chess will crush you psychologically and force you to build up a different profile of yourself from scratch, and it is this humbling that can really help re-form and change who you are as a person. I mentioned pretensions before, learning to have them sliced off on the board can help you learn more about yourself off it.

I would like to think that my ego was in check off the board too, however as with everyone, there was always something there, and chess has helped my understand that part of myself and learn to see it and understand it as part of who I am as a human with all those emotions and irrationalities mixed in with the emotion and the rational.

It is something that I didn’t expect but am grateful for. The psychological re-calibration I have seen in myself is refreshing and proves that we all have parts of us we are not always conscious of and that certain activities can help us see ourselves in a different light, see our psychological strengths and weaknesses and learn to work with them and on them with understanding and metta.

Embracing Determinism

 

Cause and effect is a funny thing. In its simplest form it is pretty straightforward. I punch you in the arm playfully and you say “Ouch, stop that!”.

Then there are the more far reaching consequences; a rough and tough childhood and the way that plays out in relationships and how life unfolds in a larger sense.

A car hits the brakes too late and runs in to the back of another car. Again, having effects that ripple outwards; we are all in the same pond after all, from the people involved, to the witnesses.

These every day, and not so every day, physical occurrences are things we accept without thinking about. They are almost a priori in acceptance.

There is a more unsettling side though and one that is kind of unavoidable. And it really comes down to physics at the smallest scale and works it’s way up from there and to the examples above.

Common sense dictates that through experience we understand if a pool ball hits another on a pool table, relating to angle, velocity and the other variables, the hit ball will move off in a direction at a speed directly relational to the impact.

These examples can also be applied to the brain and its physical nature. But what does that mean.

The simplest connotation is that all systems are cause and effect, including the human mind.

All systems are interconnected. From a family unit, to an ecosystem, to a solar system, to a galaxy, and finally to the universe.

With everything being connected in a Spinozian as well as a physical sense and everything we think and experience being part of these systems, in theory if you simulated the universe as software in a computer (this is done on small scales relatively simply); you could replay and reset and restart that system universe.

Without interaction or interference to the initial conditions, through simple cause and effect, the closed system would and will play out in exactly the same way.

The universe is a closed system by definition.

If the above is the case, and the onus is on someone to disprove, then all our actions and history is determined and our future actions and the events yet to come are all predetermined.

What we have is an illusion of free will spun up by our consciousness and I will argue that that doesn’t matter in a, very real sense, to how we live our lives, (unless you are someone whose actions you believe are partly dictated by the fact there is an all seeing supernatural being watching us and taking notes to decide who gets to walk into a utopia at death.  A pretty sad state of affairs to need to be watched to act morally. That and/or along with being a Descartian dualist, however that is a different post entirely and would only bog this surface level one down).

What does this all boil down to?

In a nutshell everything we do, have done and will, is and has been decided through this very complex system we are a part of.

Why does this not matter?

We are animals whose senses and brains lie to us all the time. It is the nature of being a creature formed through evolution. As such we spin up narratives to suit our emotional states all the time. One such of those is the fact that we are in control of our actions and thoughts and destiny.

Even if we aren’t, our brains have evolved to give us the illusion of said control, and we can’t get outside of that box, our mind and body.

So this illusion of freedom and free will is so real that none of us tend to question it in every day life. Like walking and breathing, thinking we are making choices through our own volition is just how we think as insignificant mammals.

The beauty is, we also have a kind of mind that can understand the above. Higher level consciousness so to speak. It is disconcerting without doubt, however it does not matter in a real sense.

You can know that everything is determined and your illusion of free will is just that, and still get on fine.

The minute you stop thinking about it you go back to the default mammalian behaviours of making breakfast and worrying about your relationship and the state of the world.

And that is fine. The hard part is accepting determinism because we all love our agency a little bit too much (I am looking at you instagram et al :P)

Acceptance is not a prerequisite reality however, and the little lies we all tell ourselves to get through the day due to being mammals evolved on an oxygen rich planet fit nicely with the one you can take away from this post.

Now what do I want for breakfast…?

Let me think…

Let me choose…

 

*This is condensed thought.  If you are interested in further reading regarding thinking systems, quantum mechanics and it’s relations to the topic, determinism, evolutionary biology and psychology, dualism and the mind-body problem, or other topics touched on in this post just send me a message.

Minimalism (+digital) and the Art of Conscious Consumption – 1

 

Minimalism gets a bad rap these days. It has become almost cliche… passé.

However when you break it down to the essence of what it is and means for individuals it couldn’t be more important as an ideal; with offshoots.

Looking at, for example, what could be considered the canonical text for us Westerners, Fumio Sasaki’s ‘Goodbye Things’; minimalism becomes a microcosm and the crux of the human dilemma with regards to the modern world and the phycological issues it presents to us humans. From the historical dualistic mind-body Christian misconception that formed through the idea of dominion and the industrial revolution, the modern world as we inhabit it was formed; and minimalism is an attempt at an antidote.

Hyper capitalism, and what Varoufakis’ Technofeudalism attempts to nutshell, for example, hold within the kernel, where we are. Eloquently and concisely illustrated by The Age of Surveillance Capitalism by Shoshana Zuboff.

Consumers and cogs in the consumption machine with a data exhaust that can be recycled to facilitate the snake eating its tail.

Sherry Turkle, in Alone Together, rounds out some of the social corners and I intend to try to give my own holistic take through philosophical enquiry and logic.

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TBC and subject to change through minor edits.